Last week on 30/30, I reiterated my advice to young ladies about why they should leave their clothes on anytime a camera is around, no matter how much they trust the person behind the lens. I soon heard reaction pro and con on this post.
The con: Where do I, as a man, get off lecturing ladies on modesty? And secondly, what did I do to stop the up-the-skirt picture at school that was going around when I heard about it? (That picture was going around at a different school, where I would not have been able to stop it.)
The pro: Why should it matter if a man lectures a woman on modesty? The gender of the lecturer isn't the point -- the point is that it's good advice.
The con: Why am I not speaking to the men on this topic instead of the ladies, since men are the chief source of the problem?
It's a fair argument. My thoughts going into the writing of the piece was a belief that not enough men are standing up and telling women we don't want you engaging in this kind of behavior, given the mixed messages floating around them in our society. But guys aren't off the hook. They never were -- it's just the focus of that column wasn't on them.
So guys, I'm going to deal with you now. Notice I'm not calling you gentlemen at this point, because real gentlemen don't even think about engaging about this kind of behavior. (I find it ironic that "Gentlemen's Clubs" are called such when true gentlemen would never be seen there.) Real gentlemen, you may leave the page. Everybody else, read and heed.
Guys, you may think it's studly to score and share a few naked pictures of some girl. And I can't understand why you think that, because your worth as a guy drops with each press of the shutter and the Send button. Let's think this out: how many girls want to be with a guy who could potentially subject them to humiliation?
But you're not thinking about that. Your testosterone is controlling your brain cells, and unfortunately, some of you are still getting dates because of the paradox of some girls wanting to be around bad boys. When you're young and invincible and don't have to strike out into the world to start building your life, you think character flaws are mere pockmarks on your armor.
Then you get into the world at large, the one outside of high school and college, and you learn you don't have a free ride anymore. Your equivalent of the Amish rumspringge is over and you need to plant a stake. I'll give you one guess at where employers are getting a chunk of information about your life. It's the "f" word, not the one you probably casually drop as "a meaningless intensive" -- as Webster's politely calls it -- but the one that just turned into the paper trail for your scoundrel youth.
Maybe you're moderately smart enough not to be so brazen with social media. You say you're not dumb enough to get caught doing that. You say, hey, it's just a "guy thing," just like going to those aforementioned clubs. I've got a response for that: Numbers 32:23, which says, (NIV) "You may be sure that your sin will find you out." The context of this verse is Moses telling the nation of Israel that they can't follow GOD half-way. And a lack of decency falls under that category, as mentioned in 2 Corinthians 6 (NIV): "Come out from them and be separate, says the LORD. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you."
This is where some of you say you don't believe in GOD. To which I say, what about believing in your wife, the one you said you would honor and cherish when you married her? This is either your current one, or the one you wish to have, but you will end up alienating either of them because you just can't practice self-control. Maybe those girls who loved bad boys thought it was cool in school, but now they're also planting stakes and don't have time for juvenile delinquency. They've matured; you haven't.
GOD is right about sin finding you out. Lightning may not come out of the sky to strike you down, but sooner or later, you will deal with the consequences whether you believe in HIM or not. You will deal with the anger of the ladies whose lives you messed up with nude pictures. You will deal with their blame. You may even deal with their lawsuits. And they will not want to deal with your excuses saying, "I was just having fun," or "She didn't mind."
It's not fun. It's not fair. It's not edifying. It's dirty pictures. Delete them.